WHY is it that everyone wants so much to be something they're not:
shinier hair
tighter abs
whiter teeth
longer eyelashes
smaller pores
fatter hair
tighter butt
poutier lips
bigger boobs
wrinkle-free face
hairless everything
barbie-doll worship (which they've outlawed in iran - not the worship part, but the barbie dolls). if i spent all my time trying to achieve all of the above, i'd have no time to sleep (not that i can sleep), but still. or perhaps i'm just a bitter old woman who's ass will never be uplifted again (maybe i need joel osteen's assistance). my goal is to be the exact opposite of the above - grey, saggy, stained, stubby, flat, creased and hairy. in fact, i have realized at least one of those attributes, but i'm not telling which.
i've also decided that i need a new nickname, like "the unit", or "love porkchop"or something similarly ridiculous (or "ridic" if i was 20). truthfully, someone named me love porkchop once when i was on the school bus in 4th grade; i wish i could remember why. but i know i liked it.
mtv is for the stupid generation.
i AM NOT watching 'jersey shore' right now.
tricia
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